Every time I look in the mirror, I see my father… and the older I get, the more I look like him. It took me many years to get right with this reality, and it doesn’t bug me anymore. I chuckle to myself that maybe my son will be pondering the same things in 20 years. I also inherited my father’s perpetually stuffy nose, but luckily I inherited a decent head of hair from my mom’s side that has (so far) resisted graying.
In my 20’s I started picking up some of my father’s mannerisms too. He had passed away in my teens, so I can’t even say it was behavioral influence… it HAD to be inherited. There was no other explanation. It was the start of a long downhill slide of slowly turning into my father. Why even resist? I can’t do anything about it. THAT is the power of inheritance.
When we discuss ‘inheriting,’ our minds often jump straight to money, but we tend to overlook all the things we have already inherited from our parents. Our appearance, our mental health and the propensity for longevity or disease. It is not just genetic either but behavioral as well. How about your sense of humor or the tendency for optimism/pessimism in your life? Think about the morals, values, and faith your parents instilled in you. All these things are your inheritance, and all these things are an inheritance you give to the next generations. Inheritance takes on a rich meaning because inheritance is full of life!
Our work as financial advisors provide a unique opportunity to delve into the financial side of inheritance. Financial inheritance can be laced with emotion and fraught with pitfalls. There is often sadness attached to the inheritance because that means a parent or grandparent has passed away. Family dynamics play a huge role in how inheritances are viewed and carried out and ultimately if it is a blessing or a curse. Financial inheritance can rip families apart because of poor communication during a parent’s life or kids’ unmet expectations when the plan is revealed and carried out. From the parent’s point of view, their work is called Estate Planning. That is simply answering who gets our stuff when we die and how that happens.
On the other end of the spectrum is the generation who will be inheriting. This process of inheriting parent’s wealth is an entirely different aspect that doesn’t get much attention. The common refrain we hear from the kids is, “How does all this work, and how can I be wise with it?” Because there just isn’t much guidance out there for the generation that is inheriting, I am featuring this topic in our next client event on Thursday March 13th at noon. Please click here to RSVP for the In-Person event or the Virtual event and recording. We will be covering lots of the tips and traps of ‘How to Inherit.’
For the inheriting generation there are lots of technical details and rules surrounding taxation and liquidity, but the overarching question is, “What should I do with it?” The best answer is often three-fold. First, push pause on making any big decisions. You need to sit with this for a while and let any emotion calm down. Second, use a portion of that financial inheritance to do something you’ve been wanting to do and that you know your parents would be honored by. Third is to do the work of making that money yours and fitting it into the plans and goals you are already working towards.